I have scarily smart and accomplished friends. Earlier today, a close friend called with the news that he's switching jobs to join his friend's wildly popular start-up. I was absolutely thrilled for him and even after we hung up, I was so excited and energetic that I completely lost all focus and discipline to finish a different piece I was in the middle of writing.
From Wikipedia: Schadenfreude - the pleasure derived from someone's misfortune.
There's no specific term for the opposite, but I had a pleasant realization - it's been a while since I've experienced jealousy or schadenfreude. It's incredibly freeing to shed these emotions; they are among the darkest of human emotions.
Typically, we interpret events and information in relation to ourselves. If we are insecure or discontent with our own lives, the good news of others can be upsetting. We turn inwards and focus on what this news means for us, what it says about our lives in comparison. But when we come from a secure place, we are able to focus outwards, on others, without letting our ego taint the situation.
It sounds simple to write out - being satisfied with ourselves, but personally, I've found it a bit tricky to put into practice. Millions of words have been inked about the psychological unease of Facebook comparisons and I do indeed notice that my newsfeed is filled with stories of exotic vacations, new jobs, new relationships - hundreds of people sharing the best moments of their lives in work and love. How can one not feel some slight pang on a variation of 'I wish my life...'?
It's not always possible, but I have been trying to derive the utmost out of each moment. Slicing a peach into cubes, walking for most of an evening, playing music on repeat for hours to produce a few hundred words, in these moments and more, I am learning to cultivate a sense of contentment that these are the exact things I'm meant to be doing, at this very time. I think from this, it has been easier to set jealousies aside and instead, offer sincere goodwill towards others in their moments of happiness.